I can now report that I have tasted a handful of pistachios hailing from Iran.
(In a deal made in the Clinton Administration, Iran can legally export pistachios and rugs to the United States. However, the tariffs on pistachios are reportedly punitive in order to nurture the Californian pistachio industry.)
I will say that they are a bit more buttery than the ones I usually get at Trader Joe's--which I believe buys em from Californian farmers--but the whole Iranian pistachios are to American pistachios as Champagne is to Thunderbird analogy is, um, more than a bit of a stretch.
Still, it was awful nice to finally get a chance to try em.